ballet class and the donning of pink tights

norwegian national opera and ballet, oslo by snøhetta 

This week I started taking a ballet class. I know, I haven't taken a ballet class in over twenty years. But before you question my logic, I will share with you my reasoning: I eventually want to write a ballet, and I thought that taking a ballet class would be a good first step.

I had this same logic a few years ago when I wanted to write an opera, and so I registered to sing in the opera chorus while I was at USC. Granted, the result of my singing in "Dialogues of the Carmelites" was not ideal: my friends pointed and yelled "Nun killer!" at me for weeks. You would think I'd learn from past mistakes, but I have not. I'm a bit dense if you haven't noticed.

To participate in this ballet class, my wardrobe needed adjusting. I merely cannot walk in with a tank top, leggings, and ballet shoes. No, I must adhere to the CCM dancer's dress code of a black leotard, pink ballet shoes, and pink tights.

Yes, pink tights. Did you know Walmart does not sell pink tights to those who have passed their eighth birthday? It's true. Alas, I had to purchase them, and I was not happy about this. Pink is not my power color.

While gnashing my teeth, I drove to Diana's Dance and Fitness Wear in Blue Ash.

The inside looks a little more colorful. A little too colorful.

If I were to buy any other shoes besides pink ballet shoes, this would be my wall. (Maria, you would have been so proud of me.)

But I was there to purchase pink ballet shoes. The woman there asked me if I wanted split-sole or full-sole; how was I supposed to know? I was told to purchase full-sole shoes since I'm a beginner and needed to work on my arch. All I could think of was, "What arch? Have you not seen my flat feet?"

So, purchase of full-sole, child's pink ballet shoes enlarged to fit a woman's size 8 foot...check. Purchase of tight medium-sized black leotard that smooshes my top half...check. Pink tights were sold behind the counter, because, you know, people like me would definitely be stealing as many pairs as possible. Of course, at $12.50 a pair, maybe dancers would swipe them.

Here's the damage:

Two pairs of footed (not convertible) pink tights: $25

One pair pink full-soled ballet shoes: $17.25

Black leotard: $29.50

Subtotal: $71.75 (ouch)

10% CCM Discount (thank goodness) -$7.18

6.5% OH Tax: +$4.20

TOTAL: $68.77

Can I count this purchase as research for a future project? How would the IRS feel about this claim? And, can I walk around campus without running into anyone I know while donning these pink tights? I certainly hope so.